


The Blood Stained Hood

by Miyukiki



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2018-06-07 22:33:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6827896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miyukiki/pseuds/Miyukiki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When we say "fairy tales" the first thing that comes to our minds are beautiful stories of princesses, balls and true love.</p><p>Nothing could be more wrong.</p><p>Fairy tales were originally scary, full of horror, written to allow fear to enter our hearts. And this fairy tale?</p><p>Ciel Phantonhive is a handsome young lad, he is aware of the delicate position of his family. He tries to be mature and strong even though he is only a teenager. The Phantomhive family walks on the blade of a sword, constantly having to prove their loyalty after their name has fallen into disgrace.</p><p>However, something else fill and disturbs the mind of the young nobleman: the forest where no one should enter... the prison where no one can leave</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In a distant land

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thanks to everyone.
> 
> This is the first fanfiction I'm writing in English! My mother language is Portuguese. So I want to say that this is a fantastic experience for me.
> 
> This English version of my fanfic only exists thanks to the help of my dear friend Jaena-Eowyn! Love you, dear! I owe a lot to you. ( Go read her wonderful stories: http://archiveofourown.org/users/demoneyes/pseuds/demoneyes )
> 
> And my most sincere thanks to Yana Toboso for the characters that I love so much, and my friend T-Stray who inspires me with their art. ( please, go see their tumblr! )
> 
> The absolutely gorgeous cover of this fanfiction is By T-Stray. Thank you so much, my dear friend :D
> 
> Enjoy!

 

The evening finally arrives on the vast lands of the kingdom. The sun will not take long to sink behind the mountains and the green areas will sleep under the starry vaulted sky.

A small gray bird takes flight. The wind is in its wings and it speeds fast as an arrow for miles and miles. The bird continues its adventure, small eyes watching the world go by so fast it is just a colorful blur.

God, how good is the feeling of freedom! To come and go, feeling the wind and nothing to stop it in its way.

The little creature wings by fast, flying through roads and villages, towns and cities, forests and rivers, and finally reaches an immense forest. When it gets to it, the little animal flinches because the whole atmosphere seems to change. Startled, it tries to leave the place but it is as if the forest had no end; as much as it tries to leave, the more it seems to close in on him.

Panic fills the tiny heart. The shadows seem to advance and darken everything around even though the sun is still shining outside the closed forest.

There is something...

There is something here!

The bird suddenly realizes that the darkness... the darkness itself is in pursuit of it. The darkness haunts, the shadows advance, the little bird can feel the hot breath of something that follows it, running as fast as it itself is flying.

Wings beat furiously, trying to escape: everything around becomes a blur; the darkness advances, and the bird sees sharp teeth for a small fraction of a second.

The sound of a huge jaw closing fills the air. Several other animals and birds flee away from that place as the sound fills their world with horror.

The darkness then reduces its advancement and its form now becomes more defined.

The beast is immense, black as the night without the moon. His heavy legs leave imprints in the ground with each step. He swallows and licks his snout; the meal was nothing more than a small drop falling on a fervent stone. Then he sniffs and yawns, flicking his thick fur and raising his ears. Eyes burn as red as flames illuminating the huge shadows cast by the ancient trees.

It is a wolf, bigger than any other that has been seen.

The monster goes to his den, his lair, and there he lies. Despite his hunger the creature decides to rest. He closes his eyes and his breathing gradually acquires a leisurely pace.

But suddenly, his crimson eyes open. The huge head rises and the animal waits for a moment. His nostrils flare as if he caught a very yearned-for aroma.

The wolf stands up and darts through the trees. He runs towards that unique and highly anticipated fragrance. He moves quickly to almost the edge of the Black Forest.

The animal then suddenly stops. He open his mouth and gasps for air like a huge dog would do. He waits for his breathing to calm down and then an immense red tongue licks his nose. He cautiously peeks out at what attracted his attention.

The one that is from outside the woods.

His eyes pierce the figure beyond his reach.

About a little more than fifty meters away is a young lad, nothing more than a boy, riding a big brown horse. He removes his soft, hazelnut-colored hood, revealing his soft and smooth hair. It is a dark, beautiful shade that resembles polished slate. His face is delicate and handsome, still with childlike features despite the boy being already in adolescence. His eyes are a deep blue, beautiful like sapphires, and peer into the forest entrance as if he expected to see something or someone.

The beast sighs.

The boy came today, like all days, like every day... he is just delayed a bit.

Enough to leave the creature disappointed, thinking that he would not come today.

But there he is.

And the huge wolf watches him.

The wind changes and the sweet scent of the young boy can no longer reach the beast and the animal, dissatisfied, snorts. The brown horse raises his head and widens his eyes full of horror, turning them towards the woods.

The wind now brings to it the smell of the wolf, the smell of death.

The mount, frightened, rears and neighs, and the black beast watches it. Will the boy fall? Will he lay broken on the grass, helpless as a wounded baby bird?

The boy pulls the reins and, despite his small size, dominates the huge beast. He caresses the horse's neck, whispering sweet words to calm it. The animal hesitates but surrenders. The boy notices the discomfort of his beloved brown steed, and decides that it is better to go home. He takes a last look at the forest entrance and turns to leave. With a light tap of his heels on the mount´s side he heads home.

The wolf huffs again, crimson eyes widening. The child will leave! He did not want him to go! He does not know why, just that he does not want him to go.

The monster moves toward the boy, deciding to pick him up and drag him back, take him to his lair, to his darkness, but when he reaches the last trees that separate the immense field from the forest, the beast stops.

He growls and tries to move forward with all his strength but he cannot. His paws sinks into the soil, his claws digging into the soft, mossy ground, seeking the support to jump without success. It's as if a huge barrier was ahead. He cannot leave.

Fury takes over the huge animal. He growls and snorts and forces his body against this invisible thing that prevents him from reaching the one he desires. The boy who lives in his mind.

Then he notices that the young lad has left, his slender figure can no longer be seen and a black sense of loss falls on that deadly creature.

The huge wolf lifts his head and his lament reverberates in the air. The piercing wail lasts a long time before the animal silences, and returns to the trees, and to his lair.

In the great distance ahead, the boy stops the horse when he hears the howl of the big wolf. The horse tramples the ground nervously, wanting to bolt and run away from the danger it senses; however his young master keeps it there firmly holding the reins.

Why, thought the boy, did that sound not fill him with fear, but instead with anguish and the desire to return to the forest? Why it was so painful to hear the cry of a wolf? And what was it about that cursed forest that attracted him so much?

Nudging the belly of his horse with his heels, the young boy turns around again and moves toward the immense trees; but just then the familiar sound of a voice prevents him from doing so.

He returns his gaze to the road and to the young boy with tousled hair who is running in his direction.

“Ciel!! Your father is going crazy looking for you!”

He arrives panting and supports himself with hands on his knees, recovering his breath before talking again.

“McMillan, you ran all the way up here?” The young blue-eyed boy asks incredulously.

“Y-yes... I knew... you would... be here...” the boy with brown hair responds, trying to catch his breath. “And I don´t want to be here... after the sun goes down... Did you hear... that...?”

“I heard it.” Ciel replied, looking again toward the forest far behind.

“It comes from the cursed forest!” McMillan says, the words sounding like a bad omen. “Let's go home. Why do you always come here?” The question is almost a whimper.

“I... I don´t know,” is the honest answer.

“Mr. Vincent will punish you! He has forbbiden you to come here!”

“Stop talking; save your breath.” Ciel reply clicking his tongue in disapproval but reaching his hand out to his scruffy friend. “Come up here; we'll be home before nightfall.”

“Look... I promise not to tell your father, Ciel... so don´t be angry with me…”

“You do not need to tell him, McMillan...” Ciel's voice is now soft, and slightly sad. “He already knows...”

The newcomer straightens the little glasses on his face full of freckles and accepts the hand that is offered. He rides behind the blue-eyed boy and both travel quickly to their destination.

The young McMillan clings tightly to Ciel's body, fearing falling off the horse. But the mind of the young blue-gray haired boy doesn´t seem to acknowledge this fact. Neither is he thinking about his father and the severe reprimand that awaits him when he gets home.

In his mind, in his soul, there is just one thing.

The sad cry of a wolf.


	2. Father, Son and Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!  
> Here is the second chapter of The Blood Stained Hood!  
> I want to thank everyone for the comments and kudos. They really made me very happy.  
> The mystery awaits you, so welcome back to this fairy tale about Ciel and Sebastian.  
> Hope you enjoy!

The horse trots quickly, happy to leave behind the disturbing and threatening presence in the forest.

Not long after, the two boys leave the road and make for a trail. Peasants returning home after a day of work in the fields welcome their return. MacMillan smiles back at them, but Ciel is too absorbed in his own thoughts to notice. Soon they can see a large property.

The house is big and well cared for. A beautiful mansion in the midst of green fields. Orchards and chestnut trees surround the area around the mansion. The boy with brown eyes admires the beautiful house of his young friend, the largest and most beautiful home of the entire region.

Ciel´s blue eyes fix not on the huge house that belongs to his family, but on the imposing figure that awaits them in front of the entrance door.

Vincent Phantomhive: the lord of these lands, the holder of the power, the guardian of roads, trade routes, and of the peace of the Kingdom in these remote areas.

His father.

The face of Vincent is severe, and he wears a frown; Ciel sighs resignedly. He knows that he will have much to hear tonight.

“He's mad,” MacMillan whispers to his friend in an uncertain tone, but gets no response. He thinks that maybe Ciel is afraid of his father's fury. “Let's say that you were in the village. He will not find out...”

“I don’t need to lie to my father, MacMillan,” is Ciel’s firm response. “If he wishes to punish me I will accept my punishment. But I will not lie to him.”

The brown steed stops in front of the property and Ciel helps his small, freckled friend to get down from the saddle. Then he dismounts.

“Sorry for forcing you to go with me up there, Chiron.” The dark-haired boy stroked the horse. “I know you don’t like to go there, but you still take me. I'm grateful.”

The brown horse snorts in response and lightly nibbles the slate-colored locks of his master. For thanks Ciel hands him a small sugar cube, which the animal licks off from his palm hungrily.

“MacMillan, take Chiron to the stable, please. Ask the stableman there to feed him and then go home to rest.” In the distance, the imposing voice of the lord of the land was suddenly heard.

“Ciel, come with me. We have much to talk about.”

“Yes, father.”

Vincent enters the house and Ciel follows him after sending a reassuring look at his young friend. They head to a private room where the servants will not hear or interrupt them.  
After closing the door, the father turns to his son.

“Why did you leave without telling me where you were going?”

Silence.

“Ciel...”

“Because I knew you would forbid me. And I did not wish to discuss it with you...”

“If you knew that I would forbid you, why did you still go?”

Ciel sighed.

Because I needed to go, Ciel thinks, but only to himself. Because the forest calls to me. Because from that first day I looked at it, I felt its call. And I cannot be in peace unless I go there and look at the trees. And because even I don’t know why... But I need to find out... and I can only do this by going there.

The words echo in his mind, but he bites his lip so as to not let them get out. How do you explain to another person the reasons for an act when even you don’t understand why you commit it?

“You know that I don’t want you to go there alone. You seem to not understand how dangerous that place is! How much you’re putting yourself at risk!”

“It was not my intention to cause you such worry,” Ciel answered honestly. “I am aware of the danger. And I’m never unarmed.”

“That's not enough! Do not be reckless! Recklessness will cost you a high price!”

“I know it! But I...!” Noting that his own voice was loud, Ciel recomposed himself so as to not disrespect his father. “I had to go there... Do not ask me to explain why... I cannot.”

“You promised your mother that you would never enter there. Do you not honor your promises?”

“But I did not enter!” The young lad's voice was hurt. The promise made to his beloved mother was the only thing that had prevented him today from satiating his desires to know the mysteries of the black forest. “I honor my word, even if it was a promise made in my childhood!”

Vincent sighs, sounding tired.

“Son, since your mother left us... you are all I have. Every day is hard for me. I do not want to lose you, too. I cannot lose you.” His voice now is not hard, but soft and full of sadness.

Listening to him, Ciel turns his eyes to the floor and presses his lips into a thin line. It was painful to see his father suffer so much, mainly because he knew that he was the cause of this new suffering.

“Forgive me, father...” The boy's voice was low. “I will not cause you more problems... I...”

I will not go to the forest again... is what the boy tries to say, but no words leave his lips. He knows that he cannot make this promise. His hands tighten as his mind struggles between his duty to his father and the need of his soul.

The man watches his young son intently. Ciel’s head is down, and his body is shaking slightly. The nobleman can never understand why his son has this obsession with that ancient forest, marked by rumors, legends and truthful stories of death and tragedy. But so it was, since Ciel was a child.

In a brusque movement, Vincent moves forward and hugs his only child. Ciel is surprised but then returns the hug, his face hidden in his father's chest.

“I will not forbid you to go there from time to time... just never enter into that place, and never go unattended. Take one of the guards with you.”

The words are so surprisingly unexpected that Ciel mouth opens in a perfect "O". He turns his eyes to his father and finds the eyes of the older full of love.

He smiles openly, widely, joy overtaking his heart.

“Thank you, father!” The boy embraces the older man warmly. “Thank you.”

Vincent also smiles. For he sees his only son smile more genuinely than he has in a long time. He caresses the teenager’s soft locks, noting its shades. Dark gray, almost black, full of blue hues. The same shade of his own locks.

It was the shade only found in his family. The noble and rare color had always been something to be proud of, making the Phantomhives stand out in the crowd.

But now it was the color that betrayed them by revealing their identity. All eyes turned to them wherever they were, pointing discreetly at them as low whispers echoed.

“Now go refresh yourself. It's almost dinner time. For dessert we will have your favorite cake.”

“I shall. I will not be late!”

And the boy happily runs off, his heart momentarily relieved.

Later in that night, Ciel lies awake in his bed. Despite the late hour the young lad is not sleepy, but full of thoughts. Closing his eyes, he presses on them with his palms.  
And he hears in his mind the cry of the wolf.

Long and drawn out; lonely and sad.

The boy feels the hairs on his neck stand on end, but not in fear. It is more like the result of the presence of something supernatural. His heart beats fast in response to that call.  
It is irrational, he knows, but it's like he is hearing a voice calling to him.

“Are you calling me, is that it...? Why?” he whispers.

There is no answer.

Crossly, he turns over, and buries his face in the soft pillow. He can hear his own heart beating fast.

When was the first time he felt this way? The start of all his memories?

He closes his eyes and memories of his childhood return.

The first time he saw the black forest...

It was when they had come to reside in the region.

I remember being in the carriage with my mother, he thinks to himself. We were going to our country house, the same where we live now. We could not live in the capital after what happened.

The betrayal that tarnished our name.

I was eight or nine years old.

My father traveled with us in the carriage for most of the way, but when we got to that field, he had left, riding his own horse.

There was a jolt and the carriage stopped. The cause of it was a big stone on the road. The wheel had broken and needed to be repaired. We got out of carriage and sought the shadow of some trees to rest under while the work was done.

I remember seeing the forest.

Huge, green and dark, covering a vast expanse of land. And I remember the uneasiness was born in my chest.

“What are you looking at, Ciel?” my mother asked.

“The forest. It's so big. I cannot see where it ends.”

“Oh, yes. The Black Forest. It does not scare you?”

“No; why would it scare me? They are just trees.” I reply proudly; I want to look strong for my mother, even though I admit to myself that something in those trees left me with a strange feeling.

“This forest is surrounded by legends, and the people here are afraid of it, my love. No one enters the forest.”

“Oh,” was all I answered.

A little while later my mother was dozing with her poetry book in her hands. My father and his men were busy with work on the carriage and the nurse was distracted talking to a young man that I knew she liked.

I looked at the black forest again. And I felt its attraction. It was something unexplainable, like the pull that draws a moth to the flame. I got up and walked to it, fascinated.  
The distance was not long; two hundred meters, perhaps. I quickly traversed it and found myself at the foot of the dense woods.

Something caught my eye. It seemed like something was moving in the darkness, between the shadows. There was a faint, crimson glow.

And a presence.

I stood there for some time, I could not say for how long. Captivated by my fascination with those little flames, the two of them. They shimmered and gleamed, and from their direction came a little sound, like when a dog snorts.

Heart pounding, but filled with curiosity, I took another step toward the woods.

Then I heard my mother scream my name.

I turned back and the next minute she was there and pulled me into her arms.

Then she screamed again, this time in pure terror.

And suddenly everything was happening at an incredible speed.

I heard a horrible sound, and from the trees emerged a huge wolf, black as darkness. He growled at my mother; at both of us. His teeth were huge and white, and his eyes were burning.

My eyes widened and I remained perfectly still. My mother held me tight, defending me with her own body, crying for help.

Then I heard the shots. The men of my father were shooting at the savage beast. My father was shouting too. I looked then, not for him but for the beast. I saw several bullets hit it, and its reverberating growl was so deep it was as if the ground trembled. Our eyes met for a brief moment.

And I saw my image in its eyes.

Everything seemed to stop.

There was no longer the sound of shots or screams.

Only those crimson eyes with my face reflected in them.

A moment later the beast howled and left. It ran through the trees and disappeared.

Everything after that was a blur.

My father took me in his arms and ran with me to the carriage, where someone brought a little water to my lips. I swallowed hard, realizing only then how dry my throat was. There were people saying that I was cold, and I heard my mother crying.

Then the world went black.

When I woke up we were already in the house. I was on a bed and my mother was asleep, holding my hand.

“Mother...”

“Hmm... Ciel...? Ciel! My son! My son, you're awake! Thank God!”

She hugged me and her tears fell on my face. I had been unconscious for more than a day.

After my parents made sure that I was well, my mother scolded me severely.

And that's when I promised her that I would never enter the forest again.


	3. Nightmares are real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!  
> I sincerely apologize for the delay in posting this chapter. So many things have happened to me since the last one. I had a health problem and had to do a surgery ( I´m fine now), I had some changings in my job too. And I also have other stories going on in my original account that is in Portuguese.  
> But I will not give up this story and I'll try to update more regularly so please do not give up on me too! :)  
> I want to say thank you to Demoneyes for reviewing the text and help me with the English version of it. Please go read her excellent fic Death watch: vanquishing time.  
> Without further ado, here's the chapter. I hope you enjoy!  
> Beaultiful art by my Dear Friend T-stray. t-stray.tumblr.com  
> Kisses

All was very dark.  
I felt my body floating in the darkness. It was like falling gently, without any sense of direction until finally my feet touched the ground.  
I felt the cool grass under my feet. I was barefoot. In front of me, far away, there was a faint, flickering light.  
What could that be, and where was I? I followed in that direction, anxious for answers.  
I felt the cold of the night on my body and I realized that I was naked. I continued to walk as if it was no big deal. I looked around, trying to figure out where I was, and gradually my eyes began to distinguish the scene around me.  
Huge, old trees. I was in the Black Forest.  
I walked always forward, and then the moon appeared in the sky, full and bright. The silver light bathed every corner making the forest beautiful, almost mystical. There was a gentle mist permeating the land but now I could see where I was going.  
The night was full of sounds, crickets chirped, along with a night bird. I stopped for a moment and I noticed the noise of water. I followed the sound through the trees and after an indefinite time I glimpsed a small river.  
The calm and gentle waters flowed, and a wider curve forming a quiet backwater. Hundreds of fireflies danced in the air.  
I approached the mirror-like water and found a firm structure, painted white along its edges. I sat and turn my eyes down to look at my reflection.  
I stared at the image of my own face. I spread my fingers and gently touched it.  
Small waves danced across the surface. I withdrew my hand and watched my face´s image form again.  
How to describe what I was seeing?  
There was my hair, dark as polished slate. And there were my eyes, blue as the sea which I saw in illustrations in the books I loved to read.  
It was me, but at the same time, it was not me.  
The face I saw I recognized as being mine, but it was somewhat older. More grown up and mature. The body I saw was mine, but was more developed and strong.  
And perhaps the strangest thing of all was the fact that it did not feel strange to see myself in this way.  
I heard footsteps behind me and waited. The atmosphere around me seemed to be different, as if something threatening had come. Animals and insects quieted their voices.  
Fireflies disappeared and it was as if the very light of the moon had weakened.  
"Are you not afraid to walk alone in the forest, my boy?" Sounded a deep, spectral voice. "It is dangerous... The reckless pay a very high price."  
I turned my eyes towards that voice and only glimpsed darkness. A darkness that was solid, palpable. But strangely it moved as if dancing.  
That darkness extended to me as a light fabric that is blown by the wind, and began to wrap around my body. It was gentle but firm as shackles, restricting my movements.  
"Will you pay the price, young man?"  
It was terrifying. It would be terrifying for anyone.  
But it was not for me.  
Then I heard my own voice, sounding slightly more deep and powerful that it always had been.  
"Enough. End your play. Let me go, Sebastian."  
The darkness chuckled, as an accomplice of a secret shared only by us, and gathered itself inward.  
Once again the light of the moon shone forth, and I could see. Where a moment ago was a being of darkness, there was now a very tall man.  
His hair was black and his skin was unblemished white. His face was very beautiful and perfect. His eyes glittered like embers.  
He was also naked.  
And it did not seem to disturb me.  
He sat next to me and whispered. And his voice, soft and deep, was like a caress.  
"Why do you always think that you can control me? You are an arrogant brat." He said smiling.  
"It's because I'm not wrong. I can actually do it." I answered without hesitation.  
"And why do you think this?" He asked raising an eyebrow.  
"You're back to your original form, is that it?" I replied with a triumphant smile.  
"Pride is a sin." He laughed.  
"Surely you are not someone who preaches virtue." I laughed back.  
"No, actually... I love the sin..." And he leaned to me and pressed a hot kiss on my shoulder. "As I love the sinner."  
He looked up and our eyes met. His eyes glowed in the semi-obscurity with a crimson light. I could not and, I dare to say, did not want to divert mine. That light was like fire: it will consume you, it will devour you.  
But for me that flame was gentle. It brought warmth to my body and my mind, sending away the cold of the night.  
His hand touched my face and he approached. His thumb stroked my lips softly, his touch smooth like silk. He leaned back and I knew what he would do.  
I closed my eyes and I waited.  
But the touch did not come, and once again I felt the cold of the night invade me.  
I opened my eyes and I was elsewhere, the river gone. In front of me was a huge oak tree. Its thick branches stretched as huge arms dominating the environment.  
I walked up to it and touched it. The wood was cold to the touch. I felt the hairs on my neck stand up. There was something threatening there.  
And suddenly it become hard to breathe and I felt moisture running down my chest. I touched it and looked at my fingers, and they were crimson.  
It was my blood.  
I coughed and felt the metallic taste invade my mouth.  
"What is going on?!"  
I saw my blood dripping in thick drops on the floor and then each of them drain into the oak. The ancient wood absorbed it eagerly.  
I needed to get out of that place. I turned to run, and found a dark figure was behind me.  
"Here's your reward." The voice sounded cruel and full of contempt. "I wanted so long the power, I deserved it! But then you came! And with your charms you stole what I fought so hard to win."  
The being waved their hand and the ground disappeared beneath my feet. I was now attached to the huge oak. My arms stretched and fixed in it. My vision blurred and I struggled to remain conscious as a copious amount of blood abandoned my body.  
The dark figure floated up to me and held my face roughly.  
"You are very handsome..." I felt their other hand run down my chest and caress me. "Your body is tempting and your precious blood will return what was stolen from me."  
"Y-you..." I whispered feeling weaker and weaker, but the rage inside me becoming stronger and stronger "...will... pay... I... I will remember..."  
"You will remember?" The shadowy figure laughed "And do you know who I am? No, you do not know. You will die ignorant of my name. And you will be the link in the chain which I need to create."  
Breathing was now difficult and painful. I heard a buzzing in my ears. My vision darkened and in a last, extreme effort I opened my mouth and a name left my lips, trembling with fury. The eyes of that being opened in surprise when they heard my call.  
"S-Sebastian...!!"  
"SEBASTIAN!"  
I woke up suddenly.  
The name was still fresh on my lips. My heart was beating so fast it hurts. Cold sweat was dripping from my body, and I was shaking. Anger still dominated me. I gasped for air, feeling suffocated.  
I remained in that state for long moments, blinking as the vivid images still plagued my mind. Gradually I calmed down enough to notice that I was in my room, in my bed; not in the forest.  
I was not dying, tied to an ancient oak.  
Everything was exactly as I had left it the night before: books, furniture. Through a little gap between the heavy curtains I could see a dim light.  
The new day had dawned.  
I covered my face with my hands and rubbed my eyes. My pulse was returning to normal.  
I had never had a dream like that; so real, so disturbing. I ran my hand over my chest, looking for the mortal wound from where my blood had gushed so red and hot.  
Obviously, there was nothing.  
I got up and went to the bathroom and washed my face. The cold water invigorated me, taking away the feeling of death that enveloped me and seemed to suffocate me.  
I took a deep breath and looked in the mirror. There was my face, just like it always was. I was not older.  
"Oh..." And then the memory of another part of that strange dream came to my mind and I could not help but blush.  
I felt so embarrassed now, recalling how in the dream everything was so familiar and normal to me.  
Naked and at ease in front of a stranger with glowing eyes, dressed just as he had come into this world.  
A chill went through my body, and my face burned when I remembered the man's touch. A small, warm kiss on my shoulder. And another kiss I waited to get, my lips slightly parted.  
How could I dream something so inappropriate? With a stranger? With a man!?  
This man... he had a name... I knew it... What was it?  
Looking at my own blue eyes I whispered, as if to tell myself an important secret.  
"Sebastian..."

"Ciel, you ate almost nothing. And you are staring off into nothingness as well. Are you all right, my son?"  
"Yes, I am, father." I replied with a smile and brought the fork to my mouth. I chewed and swallowed pretending there was nothing wrong. "I was just thinking of a part from the book I read last night."  
"I know you like to read very much, Ciel, but to read until too late will damage your vision. You have dark circles under your eyes."  
I smiled and agreed that I would not read until the wee hours anymore, even though I knew it was not reading which caused my tired appearance.  
"Father, I will go to the village today. I will visit Dr. Arthur."  
"Alright. I will be out for most of the day on patrol of the great road. But I'll be back as soon as possible."  
After the breakfast I went to the village. It was not so far away and in fact it was not quite so small anymore. Thanks to my father's hard work in the last six years the town had grown and prospered a lot.  
I knocked on the door of the house where Dr. Arthur lived.  
"Come in, it’s open." His voice sounded so familiar.  
"Good morning, Doctor." I greeted him upon entering. He was sitting at a large table and got rushed to see me.  
"Lord Ciel! It's been a long time since your last visit. How have you been?"  
He shook my hand with affection and I smiled back. The doctor was that type of kind, sincere and simple person that makes you feel accepted and welcome. The first time we met was as much a funny thing because he widened his kind brown eyes and stammered so hard when trying to talk to me.  
He thought that it was an immense honor to meet the heir of the Earl Phantomhive. So great that he hardly knew what to say or even how to look at me straight.  
I cannot explain why he inspired such sympathy in me from the first moment we met.  
Past this initial awkwardness, our conversation flowed very well. We both loved to read and we were not much given to large crowds or sycophantic people. And even more interesting was discovering my doctor’s love of writing. His stories were fascinating and unusual and, whenever I could, I visited him to read his stories or to exchange books or reading suggestions. He had a good-sized collection of books that dealt with a large variety of subjects.  
"Did you come to read my new story? It is a story filled with suspense, I must say." He said hopefully.  
"Of course I want to read it. But that is not the reason for this visit."  
"Are you feeling well? Did you come for a consultation?"  
Only if the Doctor knows how to decipher dreams… I thought to myself.  
"I want to ask you a favor. Could you lend me one of your books?"  
"Of course, Lord Ciel. Feel free to pick any of them. May I offer you some tea?"  
I thanked him for the kindness with a small smile. He ran to prepare the drink and I went to the ample bookshelves and ran my fingers through the books. They were works that dealt with issues ranging from human health to chivalric novels. A selection of such an extraordinary mix amused me.  
I passed my fingers over them and pulled at a random one. I noticed with surprise that the cover was a picture of a big wolf.  
Almost immediately the desire to go to the black forest befell me. A feeling so strange, painful as homesickness. Why?  
The trees are calling me.  
The wolf that attacked us when I was a kid... Could it be the same wolf that howled sadly in that melancholy afternoon not long ago?  
Impossible. I saw the bullets hit it. It could not have survived...  
The memory of that sad howl filled my mind as well as the desire to find out if this was the same terrible animal of my childhood.  
"I'll serve the tea. Please, come and sit down."  
The voice of the doctor took me from my momentary trance and I quickly put the book back in its place.  
I sat next to him and the tea was served to me. I sipped the warm and comforting drink under a watchful eye.  
"You look tired. Have you not slept enough?"  
That was so apparent?  
"I had nightmares last night so I did not sleep well."  
"I understand. A bad dream can really ruin a night. What is the book you want to borrow?"  
"Once you said to me that you had received as a gift a book that told stories of this village, trivia and facts and that there were reports of more than a century ago."  
"Yes, I recall it. It is a small copy of a manuscript of two brothers who traveled the country collecting legends and superstitions. I need to find where I put it. Are you in a hurry?"  
"No, I can wait. Thank you for your kindness."  
Before Dr. Arthur could answer me heavy knocks sounded on the door and I heard the strong voice of one of my father's men.  
"Excuse me, doctor!! Is the young master Ciel there?" The man yelled, and I was surprised by his rude behavior. Could it be that something had happened?  
My doctor ran and opened the door and I saw Jim rush in.  
"Young master Ciel! Your father sent me to immediately pick you up. She is here! Master Vincent found her in the road.”  
I got up to my feet.  
She!!  
"Are you sure it's her? But without a warning?"  
"Yes, sir. I came running all the way here; they should be coming to the mansion now, master Ciel."  
"Is everything alright? Did something happen?" My doctor asked somewhat frightened by not knowing what was going on.  
"I need to go, Dr. Arthur." And without any further explanation I ran through the door accompanied by Jim.  
I flew down the road mounted on Chiron, leaving Jim behind. My horse was bigger and stronger than his and my hurry to get to my house was also bigger and stronger.  
Reaching my home I dismounted and rushed to the house. The carriage was really there! I ran to the door and threw it open.  
"Mother?!"  
I gasped, my heart pounding, and waited for the answer.  
Moments later she appeared in the hall, accompanied by my father.  
"Ciel! Oh, my God, you're all grown up!" She said with tears in her eyes. Her arms opened up to me, and I threw myself in them, forgetting that I should greet her with respect before anything else.  
She hugged me tight and her kisses rained down all over my face.  
"My son, I missed you so much... you are so handsome... Look at you."  
I hid my face against her chest; I did want not cry. I did not want her to see me cry.  
I felt the arms of my father envelop us both and we three stood there in silence. Just feeling the warmth and affection, the happiness of a family gathered together again.  
After a long time we parted and smiled at each other in complete and simple joy of being together.  
I heard the sound of boots. I looked into the other room and saw the austere woman who always accompanied my mother. Her name was Hilde and I did not like her.  
"Good morning, Lord Ciel." She greeted me coldly.  
"Good morning, Miss. Hilde." It was also my cold answer.  
But I did not give any more attention to her, only to my beloved mother. How long had it been since the last time I hugged her?  
The rest of our day was good, full of laughter and joy. My father did not return to patrol nor I to my classes. We walked together; we talked; we took our meals together.  
Little joys that most families enjoy every day, often without giving them due importance precisely because they are such trivial things.  
After dinner, until the time for us to go to bed, my mother read to me, with my head on her lap and her soft fingers stroking my hair tenderly.  
It was a happiness that I knew would not last much longer.  
The next morning arrived, and the light brought me not joy, but rather the feeling of loss.  
I greeted my parents wishing them a good day but we all knew that the day would not be exactly good.  
My mother would leave after breakfast. And I did not know when I would see her again.  
While preparing for her departure, an unexpected visitor came to see me. It was MacMillan.  
"Good morning, Ciel. Sorry to come so early," he said, somewhat embarrassed. "But Dr. Arthur was very concerned because you left so rushed from his house. He asked me to come to find out if you're well."  
"I'm fine, MacMillan, thank you. I will apologize to Dr. Arthur tomorrow. It was very rude of me to have left without giving him any further explanation," I said, knowing that my doctor would be sincerely worried. "But I had a reason to return home so soon."  
At that moment my mother appeared, accompanied by my father and Miss Hilde.  
"Good Morning. Are you a friend of Ciel?" She asked with a sweet smile.  
"Oh, yes, ma'am! Good Morning!" He replied blushing. "Good morning, Mr. Vincent!"  
"I'm very happy to meet you. I'm Rachel, Ciel´s mother."  
I saw the mouth of my friend fall open in astonishment and his gaze go from her face to mine and then back to hers.  
"It i-is a great honor, my lady!" His face was bright red. "I did not know that you would be here today!" He stuttered, and I ended up smiling.  
"I came to visit, but I could not announce my arrival." Her smile became sad, MacMillan probably not noticing it, as I did. "But I need to leave now. My duties require it."  
The luggage was taken and the carriage was prepared. My father held the hand of my mother in his hands and whispered sweet words wishing her a good trip. He leaned over and laid on her lips a chaste kiss.  
Then my mother turned to me. We hugged and she kissed my cheek as a farewell. Her lips brushed my ear and she whispered a request full of motherly love.  
Hilde furrowed his eyebrows noting her gesture but said nothing. After a few more goodbyes, both boarded the carriage and left.  
"Your mother is very beautiful, Ciel! You have her eyes." My friend said, smiling. "Wow, it's a great honor that she is part of her majesty´s court, is not it? Too bad she cannot come to visit you more often."  
I bit my bottom lip and nodded, and my voice trembled.  
"I'll watch the carriage from the top from the hill. I'll be back soon; I'm sorry." I said averting his eyes. "I will wave to her."  
I ran to the stables and took Chiron, who had already been prepared by my request, and left, one of my father’s men with me.  
I headed to the small hill that was not too far from home. There I could see the road. I saw her carriage. I waved and saw my mother shake a white handkerchief in the window to show that she saw me.  
When the carriage finally disappeared on its way I thought about the words my mother had whispered to me.  
"Be strong, my son... fight, never let them catch you. Stay safe... promise me that you will not let them catch you."  
I clenched my fists that held the reins of my horse.  
No, MacMillan... It is not an honor that my mother is serving in the court. It is a proof that after the betrayal we are victims, as Her Majesty did not trust the Phantomhives anymore.  
My mother was her hostage.  
And this nightmare was real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And gradually things will be revealed. No, Ciel's mother was not dead (much less by the wolf XD).  
> Now you finally know what happened to her.  
> In the next chapter more revelations about what happened to the Phantomhives and the betrayal that they were victims of. And for who were eager to see Sebaciel moments I gave a small taste of what this fic will have. XD  
> I'm also looking forward to the times when they both will actually meet but I want this story to have mystery and the dark atmosphere of the old fairy tales. (Those actually were to scare children.).  
> I hope you enjoyed. Tell me your opinions and theories!  
> And see you in the next chapter!


	4. A boy´s tears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> After a long hiatus I finally updated this story.
> 
> I apologize for taking so long and thank everyone who sent me reviews, kudos and words of encouragement.
> 
> Especial Thanks to my dear friends Jaena-Eowyn/Demoneyes (who helped me with the English version of the chapter) and ChromeHoplite. Their both encouraged and supported me! Thank you so much!

The carriage pulled away and was soon lost in the distance. The boy's lips tightened in a thin line in an attempt to keep the tears he felt burning in his eyes from falling.

"Lord Ciel, we cannot see Lady Phantomhive's carriage anymore. Do not you think we'd better go home?”

"Yes; let's go," the boy replied, pulling on Chiron’s reins and starting forward without looking at the man; he would not allow his weakness to be observed. He would be the future Lord; he should above all things be strong.

As he passed the black forest, he felt once more the familiar pull: the sensation that drew him just like a spell. It was something he could not resist; he simply did not have the strength to do so.

And he realized even if he could, he would not resist.

"Jim, let's skirt the edge of the black forest."

"But, sir, this will take us a longer distance."

"I know it's a silly wish, but I'd like to ride for some more time. You can go home if you prefer. I'm used to going there alone." Ciel answered.

"Not at all, sir. I'll go too," the man replied quickly, realizing that it would be much worse to come home and tell his master that he had left the man’s only heir alone than to waste a little more time attending to the boy's whim.

In a few minutes they reached the forest. Jim looked impatient. He most assuredly was; if they had not come this way, they would have probably already been back at the mansion.  
Well, the boy thought, I gave him the option of leaving without me.

The blue-eyed young lad stopped his horse and looked at the trees in the distance: beautiful, old and unfathomable.

How much of their mystery was real, and how much was superstition, he wondered?

It was hard to say, since no one now ever tried to enter it. Terrible legends of missing people, of a beast made up of darkness that roamed through the trees, cruel and ruthless in punishing those who put their feet in its dominion. Hungry wolves ready to devour the unwary, ghosts of those who disappeared screaming in terror, and then despair, desperate to leave the prison of the trees and find rest and comfort.

 

The forest was more than feared; it was almost seen as a living being, a hungry entity that was thirsty for blood and souls.

The last reports of people who had disappeared inside it were more than a century old. But it was not the stories of horror and fear that fascinated him. Far from it, even though he had become more curious about them recently.

For it was not fear that he felt when looking at the trees, but something like nostalgia; a yearning. A feeling of having lost something precious, which was then replaced with a void that could not be filled by anything else.

Or was that feeling partly the emptiness of having his mother taken from him, and his honorable family name stained by treason and dishonor?

No. It was something beyond that, an added burden to the others he already had in his heart.

Hidden in the shadows of the trees, it silently watches him. Unseen in the darkness… an immense wolf. It blinks its red eyes and sniffs, sucking in the air and reveling in the boy's much-loved scent. Oh, so sweet and desired. He had missed him.

He had been restless all night, not knowing if something dire had happened to keep the dark silver-haired boy away. What had prevented the boy with eyes of summer sky from coming to see him yesterday?

But all the worry was now just a bad memory, like a fading dream. He was there, astride his horse, his beautiful blue eyes once again gazing into the dense forest; watching for something. The beast licks his muzzle and feels once more the urge to lunge out and throw himself at the boy and steal him for himself. But he knows the forest is his prison.  
He cannot leave. And the boy will probably never enter.

He sits down and watches him, searing that slim, beautiful figure into his memory, to feed his dreams for when he returns to his lair.

The wind which had brought to him the sweet scent of his angel shifted direction suddenly, and now blew towards the boy.

Ciel felt the breeze change direction and caress his hair. Chiron fumed and whinnied uneasily as if the wind had become the harbinger of danger.

The feel of the fresh air felt so good to Ciel, though. Like soft fingers touching the boy's skin, sliding gently in a caress; he closed his eyes, indulging in this little pleasure.  
"I missed you," the forest wind seemed to whisper to him. He remembered that due to his mother's visit he had not come to the forest the day before.

"Forgive me," Ciel whispered back. His fingers touched his lips as if seeking a sensation, a memory.

"Did you say something, my lord?" The coarse voice of the escort pulled him out of his trance. What was he doing?! His cheeks burned with embarrassment.

"I did not say anything, Jim. Let's go!" And with a touch of his heel Ciel spurred the horse to a gallop. Chiron shot away fast, glad to leave this place.

The wolf grunted in disappointment. The glimpse he had been given of the boy had been so very brief, and did not satisfy the emptiness that burned in his chest. He got up and growled menacingly. He would take out all his frustration on the prey that would be his dinner tonight.

Ciel's thoughts flew as fast as the landscape before his eyes. Why had he responded to the wind? And why was that voice so familiar? He must have heard it before.  
The face of the black-haired man he saw in his dreams rose in his mind, and the deep, silky voice invaded his thoughts once more.

No. In fact, I love the sin, he thought to himself. As I love the sinner.

"Sebastian?" The boy whispered the name to himself, feeling the taste of it on his tongue: as smooth and sweet as fresh water to someone who is thirsty.

*  
"Father?" Ciel came in to find his father sitting at the table where they had breakfast. He had his back to the boy but Ciel could see that he had his face in his hands. The man sighed tiredly, as if a great burden weighed on his shoulders.

Ciel stood there in silence for some time, unable to say anything that could be of comfort or support to his father's pain. His chest tightened as if was hard to breathe, and his sense of guilt took over.

This was his fault.

Ciel left the room, fleeing from his father, from the vision that evoked his remorse. He left the house and headed towards the training ground behind the gardens and orchards.

"Young master? Do you come to practice?" the man who was the groundskeeper responsible for the firing range asked after a bow.

"Yes; I'll practice with a shotgun." The man assented, and handed Ciel the gun. Ciel felt its weight in his hands and waited while the range keeper prepared the targets.

"Thank you. Please, leave me now. I want to be alone for a while.”

The man seemed confused for a moment but nodded in agreement and walked away. The boy waited for him to leave and then watched him as he returned to his small house at the entrance to the training camp.

Now he was alone; just him and his thoughts. He lifted the gun and positioned its butt on his shoulder. The target was at a great distance. With one eye closed, he inhaled and slowly exhaled.

And fired.

Ciel felt the kick of the gun strike his body and saw the target explode. The sound reverberated in the air. He didn’t stop to feel any satisfaction in this feat. His gaze sought and found the other target and he reloaded his weapon with a quick, angry movement.

But his mind was no longer there despite his concentrated expression. Images from four years ago had come back to haunt him.

 

He was about ten years old. A carriage with the royal coat of arms and a guard entourage came to bring them a message sent by the queen. It was something of great importance and he remembered the expression of distrust that his father made when he learned that a royal entourage was approaching.

When the representatives of the queen arrived they were received with courtesy and hospitality, as was the duty of a loyal servant. After they had eaten and drank, it was time to do business, and the message be finally delivered to his father.

Ciel had not been allowed into the meeting room, because he was still a child. But curiosity made him sneak in anyway, and hide behind a heavy curtain inside the room. He wanted to know what was so important about this message.

He recalled how his father's face had paled as he read the message, and how he had looked at Ciel’s mother as if to say something, but his lips did not move. After a long moment his father addressed the royal messenger in a low voice with nothing of the confidence that was so characteristic of him.

"You came to take him? There will be no time for proper preparations. I ask you to wait at least one more season."

"Lord Phantomhive, I am afraid that will not be possible. Your majesty has made an escort available for our guest. To reject such an honor would be more than rude or inappropriate. It could be seen as insubordination..." His voice was dripping with malice, and the boy noticed how the last words he said disturbed his father as an offense would do.

"The Phantomhives have never disgraced Their Majesty or rebelled against Their orders. He… will be ready to leave in the morning, and you will take him as your guest. I do beg your pardon. Lady Phantomhive and I will retire for the night now."

Ciel waited for everyone to leave the room, and then ran upstairs to his parents’ rooms. He needed to know what was happening and what had made his parents so apprehensive. As he approached the door he heard them talking.

"Vincent, do not let them take Ciel! Not my son!" His mother's voice was distressed. "You know they just want to have something to give them power over you. They have no real interest in our son's future!"

"Rachel, I know that." The boy's heart was pounding, and his mouth grew dry. "I know. But I do not know how to escape this order. Her majesty offers that Ciel should be educated in court, to serve her as her personal pageboy. The message is made to sound like a vote of confidence for our family and concern for his future. It says that he will be educated by the best tutors, and her majesty cloaks her true intent in sweet words of friendship and consideration. A refusal on our part would sound like contempt for all the effort we have made to demonstrate our loyalty."

"I cannot bear it, Vincent! Away from us and among strangers. People I do not trust! Ciel is just a boy. I am afraid. I will not let him go. We cannot deliver him." Ciel heard her voice tremble with despair in every word.

"My son alone, in the court’s hands..." His father's voice was low, as if describing some horrendous nightmare. "The sole heir of the Phantomhives, alone on a stage within reach of those who thirst for power and see us as a threat. And I am powerless to protect him."

The boy ran off at those words. He was scared; he did not know what to do. His heart was pounding and he felt suffocated. He did not want to be taken away by strangers; he did not want to leave his father and mother. 

He was just a child.

He shut himself in his room, trembling. They would take him in the morning. He did not know if he would ever see his parents again. His mind was a whirl of confused thoughts, along with fear, anger, and sadness.

Then he made a decision which he regretted later.

They could not take him if he was not there in the morning.

Ciel left his room and the house without anyone noticing and ran into the darkness. He would hide somewhere until they had left. At that moment in his turmoil he did not stop to think about the consequences of his escape.

He tried valiantly to reach the village, but a heavy rain began shortly after his departure. The boy was soon drenched and freezing, and he took shelter in the ruins of an old shack. The rain continued throughout the night, until he could no longer go on. His clothes clung to his skin and the cold made his teeth chatter. It was the beginning of spring, so it was still very cold.

When he was found the next morning, he was feverish and delirious. He was taken home, and he dimly remembered his mother stroking his hair and whispering words of comfort beside his bed.

When he regained full consciousness, his mother was no longer by his side. He later found out that his parents had said that he would die if he was transported under those conditions. And that his mother had offered herself to go in his place because the entourage could not return without either the boy or at least one Phantomhive.

 

He shot again and again. The targets exploded with each shot. He reloaded the gun and started shooting again. He needed to shoot, he needed not to think about it all.  
It was his fault. He should not have run away.

More shots; there were no more targets and he was still shooting. Then Ciel stopped abruptly and fell to his knees, his heart weighing too much, and tears burned in his eyes.

"It is my fault..."

The boy felt a hand rest on his shoulder and he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand before raising his eyes. His father was there.

"I've told you more than once, my son, it was not your fault."

"She went to stay in my place! It should be me and not her! She could be here and happy..."

"Son, do you really think she or I would live happily if you had left that day?" His voice was firm but sad. "Your mother and I had already decided that she would take your place. We knew they wanted only to have someone to make sure we understood our position of submission. We both agreed we would never give up our son to them. The fact that you were found sick gave us the excuse that we needed for you to not be taken.”

Ciel had heard it over and over again in the years that followed. These words sometimes relieved his guilt but never his sadness.

Or his anger.

"We'll bring her back, will not we?" He whispered with a lump in the throat. "And she will be with us once more, right?"

"Yes, my son. We'll bring her back. You and me. And by our work here."

And Ciel hugged him. Not only because he needed the comfort of that touch, but because his father needed it too. They both suffered with a feeling of helplessness: thrown about, tossed from side to side like leaves in the wind. Punished, when they had not committed any kind of crime against the Crown.

But that would not last forever, Ciel swore to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little by little the Phantomhive story will be revealed. And very soon Sebastian will join Ciel in this dark fairy tale.  
> Thank you so much!
> 
> If you want to follow me or see my arts for this and other stories here is my tumblr account and my deviantArt:
> 
> lovemyciel.tumblr.com
> 
> https://miyuki-ki.deviantart.com/


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